Sometimes, you just have to get your lovin’ where you can. And Matt and Jason really get out their grave digging shovels for 1964’s The Tomb of Ligeia. Prepare for a mindless sort of madness as your handsome hosts exhume movie background, natural lighting for home porn, British horses, death and resurrection, May-December relationships, Jason’s necrophiliac desires, Matt’s favorite Dr. Who, sexy pale girls, drinking breast milk and other things that make you go meow. Just don’t look into their eyes. They will confound you!
Purchasing a home can be a costly and sometimes risky endeavor. In addition to bad neighborhoods, high utility bills, mortgages, remodeling issues, and other assorted hassles, you might also have to deal with a terrifying ancestral curse leading to total structural collapse… with YOU IN IT! Before you buy, consider our cautionary commentary on 1960’s House of Usher. At our open house, we’ll give you the full tour of movie details, Matt’s Sex-Mex excursions, crassmanship, the King Diamond / Cesar Romero connection, “Dick”s, alcoholic nostalgia, trashing Matheson, the therapeutic value of confessions, and other mortal expenditures. After the dust settles, stick around for discussion on recently watched movies. Is there no end to our horrors? No. None whatsoever.
Welcome to Hell House. We’re delighted you could come. We’re also certain you will find your stay most illuminating. Think of Matt and Jason as your unseen servants, and believe that during your stay, you will be taken over by the spirit of 1973’s The Legend of Hell House. May you find the answers that you seek amidst movie trivia, Matt’s exciting gin adventure, creative wordsmithing, psychic nonsense, Jason’s anglophilia, the mocking of ’90s music subculture and a host of other restless souls. After the evil has subsided, join M&J for post-movie chat on recent DVDs watched. Will YOU be the only one to make it out alive and sane?
Something happened to Antonio Bay tonight. Something came and tried to destroy them. We tried to warn the inhabitants but they refused to listen to our commentary on 1980’s The Fog. But if this episode had been anything but a nightmare of porn fluffers, powerful mustaches, deformed children, naughty priests and modern cinema complaints, the dark icy death could have come again. To the Terror Fiends at sea who can hear our voices, look across the water, into the darkness. The midnight hour is near… and we’re almost out of booze!
Welcome, Terror Fiends. It seems Matt and Jason have rented a house tonight so that they can give a party, and you’re all invited. There will be food and drink and ghosts, and perhaps even a few murders. If any of you will spend the next two hours listening to our commentary on 1959’s House on Haunted Hill… well, we won’t give you each ten thousand dollars. But we will give you some spooktacular synopses on movie gimmicks, William Castle, giant blonde mullets, bad relationship advice, mondegreens, and some truly heart-stopping facts on our feature film. The party’s starting now. Are you brave enough to stay all night?
Get ready to experience an exclusive three-hour stay at the historic Overlook Hotel located in the beautiful Rocky Mountains of Colorado. The Overlook has it all — breathtaking views, rustic charm, exquisite food and drink, bleeding elevators, creepy dead girls, paranormal attacks — and don’t forget the cozy accommodations! Matt and Jason will be your guides throughout your visit by commenting on the 1980 release of The Shining. Points of interest will include book/movie comparison, relationship power plays, Jack Daniels memories, catchphrasing, the brilliance of children, and enough psychological deconstruction to keep you lost in your own mental hedge maze. When your retreat finally ends, join your handsome hosts as they discuss their recent DVD viewings. So, come listen to us… forever… and ever… and ever… and ever…
It’s tough in this day and age to find the perfect mate. Women across the world are longing to experience motherhood at any cost. And that’s why we at the Coffin Joe Institute of Eugenics want to impregnate you with a superior child. So, jump up on that examination table and let Matt and Jason put the evil seed in you as you weave in and out of consciousness, shaking and crying to the sound of their commentary on the 1964 Brazilian cult favorite, At Midnight I’ll Take Your Soul. The anesthesia might smell like rum, but you’ll soon forget all that as swirling images of Sepultura, blasphemy, Catholicism, tarantulas, Nietzsche, and spooky bearded characters fill your head. When it’s all over, stagger into the waiting room as M&J share their thoughts on recent DVD viewings. Yes, we’ll even pay the doctor’s bill. Que gostoso!
Like tossing a big ol’ bucket of pig’s blood in your face, we bring you our analysis on the 1976 telekinetic shocker, Carrie. We hoist our brews to late menstruation, shower scenes, outsider teen revenge, and the lip-glossed bitch goddess that is Nancy Allen. Okay, maybe that last part is just Matt talking, but do listen in and get all of the inside scoop on this highest moment in the directorial career of Brian De Palma. Post-movie chat covers the work of Stephen King and Clive Barker, as well as listener mail and some musings on the next movie choice. Turn on, tune in, plug it up!